Five out of ten marriages today end in divorce because romantic love is not enough. This Love and Respect message is about how the wife can fulfill her need to be loved by giving her husband what he needs -- Respect. And the husband can fulfill his need to be respected by giving his wife what she needs -- Love.
By: Dr. Steve Stephens
1. Plan ahead
Valentine's Day happens every year, February 14th. Don’t let it sneak up and catch you unprepared! Start thinking now about how to make your spouse feel appreciated.
2. Get excited
Valentine's Day is a great opportunity to show your spouse your love. Be positive and look forward to making this day special. Make it one of the best days of the year.
3. Find the right card
Read through a selection of cards to choose the perfect one which best expresses your heart. Highlight the words that show your love, and be sure to write a personal note on it.
4. Buy something romantic
Get your lover something they would like which reminds them of your love; something which touches their heart or body (such as music, a book, clothing, lingerie, or, of course, jewelry).
5. Go the extra mile
Show them you took the time to make it special. Mail the card. Wrap the gift. Be creative with the day. The key here is to put time, effort and creativity into whatever you do.
6. Be nice - Attitude is everything
This is your day to be positive, encouraging, complimentary and as polite as you can possibly be. Be on your best behavior and mind your manners. Make them proud to be with you.
7. Have fun
Do something you both enjoy. Laugh and be playful. Make the day an adventure, and create positive memories that will last the rest of your life. When it's over, relax in each other's arms.
8. Don’t make deals
Never make a deal to not exchange gifts, give cards or go out together. Your marriage is too important not to celebrate. You might need to be creative or simplify, but don’t ignore the occasion.
9. Set the atmosphere
Candlelight, romantic music and her favorite flowers. All of this can make an ordinary day into something extraordinary. Pay attention to the details which make your spouse feel relaxed and special - then apply them.
10. Dress for them
Wear what they like. Look your best for them. Dressing up can make things feel more romantic. Also smell good for them. Shower, use deodorant, suck on a breath mint and wear that perfume or cologne that they like.
11. Touch a lot
Closeness is romantic and affirming. Hold each other's hands, put your arm around your spouse, snuggle, place your hand on their leg. There is something magical about touch that makes a couple feel connected and in love.
12. Do it their way
Think of what will make your spouse happy. Go where they want to go and do what they want to do. Valentine’s Day is about love and romance, so show your love by making the day all about them.
13. Reminisce about your love
Talk about your favorite moments together, starting with when you were dating. Share times that touched your heart and times that made you laugh. Then list what you love most about each other and why you are glad you are together.
14. Renew your commitment
Say “I love you” and that you are committed for the long haul. Let each other know that you are sorry for your mistakes, insensitivities and failures, but that you want to be better and you are willing to try harder (because they are worth it).
15. Dream about your future
Talk about what you want to do together in the future - one year, five years, ten years from now. Share your dreams. Make plans about when and how to make them reality.
16. End the day well
Give each other a hug and let your spouse know how lucky you are to be married to them. Hold on tight and kiss. Who knows what this might lead to.
