More quotes....

"The greatest part of our happiness depends on our dispositions, not our circumstances."
-- Martha Washington

"We are as happy as we make up our minds to be."-- Abraham Lincoln

"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has."-- Epictetus

"We determine whether something will be a blessing or a curse by the way we choose to see it." -- Kate Nowak

"The greatest ability in business is to get along with others and influence their actions." -- John Hancock

"When you have confidence, you can have a lot of fun. And when you have fun, you can do amazing things." --Joe Namath

"'Tisn't life that matters! 'Tis the courage you bring to it." --Hugh Walpole

"My mom always taught me that the true test of your character is how you react when things are going badly."-- Mary Anne Radmacher

"Try not to become a person of success, but rather try to become a person of value." -- Albert Einstein

"Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine." -- Lord Byron

"Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence."-- Helen Keller

"Purpose is the place where your deep gladness meets the world's needs." -- Frederick Buechner

"Remember: very little is needed to make a happy life." -- Marcus Aurelius

"Listening, not imitation, may be the sincerest form of flattery." -- Dr. Joyce Brothers

Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

A sharp tongue can cut my own throat.

If I want my dreams to come true, I mustn't oversleep.

Of all the things I wear, my expression is the most important.

The best vitamin for making friends..... B1.

The happiness of my life depends on the quality of my thoughts.

The heaviest thing I can carry is a grudge.

One thing I can give and still keep...is my word.

If I lack the courage to start, I have already finished.

One thing I can't recycle is wasted time.

Ideas won't work unless ' I ' do.

My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open.

The 10 commandments are not a multiple choice.

The pursuit of happiness is the chase of a lifetime! It is never too late to become what I might have been.

Life is too short to wake up with regrets.
So love the people who treat you right.. Forget about the one's who don't.
Believe everything happens for a reason.
If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands.
If it changes your life, let it.

Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.

Friends are like balloons;
once you let them go, you might not get them back.
Sometimes we get so busy with our own lives and problems,
that we may not even notice that we've let them fly away.
Sometimes we are so caught up in who's right and who's wrong,
that we forget what's right and wrong.
Sometimes we just don't realize what real friendship means until it is too late.
I don't want to let that happen,
so I'm gonna tie you to my heart so I never lose you.

Brand New Year, Same Old Goals

It is still January, and not too late to set your goals. Every year it seems like I am just using the previous year's list. I just cross out the old year & rewrite the new year in, and Voila - I'm done.
However, this year I thought.... If I actually was achieving my goals, shouldn't I have be setting different goals every year? Here's some advice (excerpts from Meridian Magazine) that I stumbled upon for actually getting organized and some more useful goals this year:

1. Organize. Dejunk.

... I decided to “hire” myself as an organizational consultant. (My organizational consultant is like my alter-ego no-nonsense cleaning woman, who works hard but likes to be paid in cash under the table so she can go to the mall. I created her because she works much harder than that scatter-brained woman who is usually here who starts five things and finishes two and is always daydreaming about books she is going to write instead of concentrating on the tasks at hand.)

So far my organizational guru has me starting outside. She gives me a goal for the week and then comes back to check on how I've done. Since last Monday I've gone to the dump twice and the thrift store once, and I am well on my way to meeting my first goal. I think we'll be able to work together. I fear she is going to be harsh with me about some of the things I need to dispose of, but that's probably what I need.

2. Take Control of My Life

The control will likely improve as I dejunk. There will be less to organize and less clutter to get me off track. I would truly like, at least once before I die, to look around and be able to say “There! I made it! I'm organized.”

3. Take Control of My Time

I am actually starting to improve at being on time for things. Perhaps, however, this is an illusion brought about by living in Hawaii where nobody is ever on time for anything. I am likely just as slothful as I ever was but look better by comparison.

4. Take Control of Our Finances

This year we are going to start living on a budget, something we have not found necessary until recent economic woes have forced us all to be more cognizant of where our money is going. This requires a certain level of organization, but then many goals are inter-related, which brings me to my next one.

5. Stop Procrastinating

I am probably not the only one out there who does what they want to do when they should be doing what they need to do. I don't know the cure for this one except for good old-fashioned self-discipline. Anybody got any suggestions?

6. Be a Better Person

This is one of those all-inclusive ones. Be a better daughter/mother/stepmother/grandmother. Be a better friend. Give service. Be kind. Be a more loving and supportive wife. Be more grateful and less whiny. Study the scriptures more. Pray better. Go to the temple. Do all the things I'm reminded of when I go to the temple.

7. Listen more. Talk less.

This one probably speaks for itself. I'm not just a writer. I'm a talker. I like to make people laugh. Being a talker doesn't mean you aren't a good listener, but I need to make a better effort to listen more and talk less.

excerpts from: Susan Law Corpany

Breaking Bad Habits

"First we make our habits, and then our habits make us." - John Dryden
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Great article (from Meridian Magazine) -- you may not have all these bad habits listed below - but pick which ones you have & work on them... I know I have a few I need to work on and rid myself of. There's great advice in the article.

"Bad habits can be like an addictive drug—poisonous and tough to beat. The beginning of the year is the perfect time to make a goal to rid yourself of your destructive behaviors—whether your goal be to eliminate all of them or whether it be to take baby steps in that direction. Start by becoming aware of the habits in your life you could do away with and recognize your life is better off without them. Make realistic goals and reward yourself for achieving them. Isn’t it about time you grew your nails out, stopped blaming others for a bad situation, and actually took your makeup off before going to bed?

Bad Habit #1: Nail Biting

Nail biting is called an anxiety stress reducer—it’s something you do to make your stress go away. “People are just looking for something to do to reduce their stress,” says Dr. James MacArthur, psychologist and director of the BYU Counseling Center. “If it works, they might do it again next time.” But when the stressor is gone, the habit is still exists because of reinforcement, and your poor fingernails are chewed down to non-existence.

How to fix it: “The solution is to divert from something you find undesirable [like nail biting] . . . to something else,” MacArthur says. “Pick something that’s a substitute that doesn’t have a negative outcome. Do that more positive substitute regularly as well.” You might also try painting your fingernails or getting a manicure; that way, every time you’re tempted to gnaw on your nails, you’ll think twice about wasting the time and money you put into them. You might also use a special polish with a foul taste, which will certainly remind you to keep your fingers away from your mouth.

Bad Habit #2: Perfectionism

As a culture, we are encouraged to always do our best. Even at a young age, we get the message to be perfect from our parents. We think mistakenly that we are accepted only after doing something right, like earning straight A’s. “Perfectionism is a lifestyle issue that often has to do with how you view yourself,” MacArthur says. “Perfectionistic people often find themselves unacceptable if they don’t do everything right.”

How to fix it: Redefine your self-image so it is more self-tolerant, reasonable, and flexible. MacArthur says to tell yourself, “I’m okay ‘in process’; it is okay to make mistakes.” He adds, “Mistakes can be part of learning. They can be stepping stones toward growth.” Try to remember life is a growing process, and don’t expect to be fixed the first time you try. Give yourself time limits for projects so you don’t spend unreasonable amounts of time doing something until it’s just right. Try letting some unimportant things in your life go. Let the dishes pile up in the sink. You’ll see that the world doesn’t come to an end, and that some things just aren’t that important. It’s okay not be perfect in all aspects of your life; in fact, it’s normal.

Bad Habit #3: Late-Night Snacking

Eating late at night is the result of one of two motivations; one is physiological, like not getting enough to eat in the day. “If you don’t eat a balanced breakfast your body is at a deficit at the end of the day,” says Kendra Shaila Fried, a dietitian from Wasatch Integrative Health. This causes you to crave foods at night in order to make up for the loss. For example, if you don’t eat healthy fat (some nuts or oils), you could crave ice cream or other forms of undesirable fat, she says. “When snacking at night, we often fill our bodies with calories but not necessarily nutrient-dense food,” Fried says. “Our bodies can’t utilize this energy efficiently while we are sleeping so we store the calories as fat.”

You might also be ignoring what your true needs are. Fried says we all need “primary food,” which consists of good relationships, religion/spirituality, hobbies, and other things that make us whole. If you don’t nourish yourself with primary foods, you can end up craving comfort foods to compensate.

How to fix it: If you late-night snack because of physiological reasons, make sure you’re getting enough to eat during the day. “Discover the best breakfast for yourself,” Fried says. Experiment with different foods for breakfast and document how you respond to it. Are you still hungry? Are you satisfied? Also, you might not be getting enough for lunch, so fill up earlier in the day when your body can still burn calories. If you’re snacking not out of hunger, but out of more emotional reasons, Fried recommends replacing your snacks with primary foods. “Discover the things you enjoy doing and feed yourself on that level.”

Bad Habit #4: Letting Yourself Go As Life Gets Hectic

Everyone has their own reasons for justifying it—a family that increasingly demands more time, a profession that saps time and energy—but a good majority of people let themselves go as time goes by. You may have stopped working out, started eating more unhealthy foods, or started disregarding care of your outward appearance.

How to fix it: “Be healthy for your spouse and children,” Fried says. Obesity and an inactive lifestyle lead to health-related problems that can leave your family distressed and responsible for your lack of self-care.” Consider the possible results of your disregard for your body and appearance; providing a good example for your children is, on the most fundamental level, a strong reason to take care of yourself. Fried says finding “primary foods” is a top priority for couples. If you and your spouse don’t participate in activities together, you might be eating out of boredom. Discover active hobbies you can enjoy together that foster intimacy and health. Go for a family walk at the end of each day. It makes a difference.

Bad Habit #5: Pointing the Finger

Anything that goes wrong in your life is someone else’s fault, naturally. Problems, hardships, even your own character flaws (“But I learned that from my mom!”) are much easier to blame on other people than actually admitting you did something wrong. People who project blame very often feel shame for having negative qualities and do whatever they can to distract themselves from noticing their own flaws, but they’re only in denial.

How to fix it: Adopt the mantra, “The buck stops here.” You are in charge of your own life, and while outside events can have an impact on you, only you have the choice of how to deal with them. Admit your mistakes. Apologize when you’re in the wrong. Recognize your shortcomings, and take responsibility for them.

Bad Habit #6: Gossiping

Once you hear something juicy, you’re just bursting to tell someone else, regardless of whether it’s harmful or even true. “Gossiping is how a lot of people connect with each other,” says Jeannette Maw, a professional life coach. “This is just how we fit in.” But by gossiping, you give place for negativity within yourself and project it on another person, and you are probably destroying trust and relationships.

How to fix it: Be conscious of it. Some people make it a goal to leave the conversation when gossiping occurs. Others make a commitment to say only good things and make their decision known to others. Be aware of your conversation topics, and if they turn into gossip, change the subject.

Bad Habit #7: Laziness

Laziness is a standard enough habit; it’s hard to be motivated about mundane and boring things. But you may want to take a second look at your laziness, because it can be an indicator for something larger. “A lot of people think they lack motivation, but they really lack passion or inspiration,” Maw says. “When we’re working on something that matters, laziness doesn’t even come into play.”

How to fix it: Laziness could be a sign that something is not important to you. If you’re lazy about doing your job, you could be in the wrong business. Find the things in your life that you’re lazy about and decide whether they really should be in your life or not. But there are always things that are necessary, like chores, that most people are more than willing to be lazy about doing. For those things Maw suggests, “Find a way to see it as a way to contribute to your life’s purpose; it makes [these things] much easier to do.”

Bad Habit #8: Slouching

Slouching could be a habit formed through lack of self-esteem, sitting in poorly supported chairs, or out of laziness. And it can cause serious problems. “It stretches [some] muscles and tightens others,” says Charles Numbers, M.S., P.T. “It puts extra stress on joints and muscles.” Numbers says slouching can ultimately lead to headaches, a deformed spine, and disc problems and injuries.

How to fix it: Numbers says staying fit and getting a daily aerobic exercise of twenty to thirty minute can significantly improve posture. He suggests taking a brisk walk, or doing yoga and Pilates to strengthen your core and back muscles. But first, like all bad habits, you have to be actively aware of your bad posture and sit up straight every time you notice yourself slouching.

Bad Habit #9: Sleeping with Makeup On

You’ve had a long day—make that a long past five years—and you’re so tired that washing your face takes too much effort, so you just go to bed with your makeup on. This is bad news for your skin. “Most foundations have a lot of oils, fragrant fillers, and dyes, which are very harmful to the skin,” says Jody Brown, master esthetician at Rocky Mountain Women’s Health Center. “It contributes to acne breakouts, and to oily skin, causing enlarged pores.” Pollution and smog also collect on your face during the day and can contribute to premature aging.

How to fix it: “Your face needs to be cleansed morning and night,” Brown says. “Whatever routine you do [morning and] night, just take two seconds to cleanse your face. It’s not really time consuming.” Brown says the whole skin care regimen, like cleansing, toning, and applying other products sold to you as “must-haves,” isn’t necessary for most. Just a quick cleanse will do wonders for your skin.

Bad Habit #10: Technology Addiction

You may feel the need to be connected to your social network 24/7, and thanks to cell phones, text messaging, and e-mail, it’s possible. But the problem is, you don’t know when to stop. You text while talking to other people, you check your e-mail every five minutes (even when you’re not expecting something), and talk on your cell phone while driving, despite the danger to yourself and others. (A Harvard study in 2005 estimated that 330,000 people are injured and 2,600 people are killed in cell phone related accidents each year.) You feel anxious without your phone and don’t know what to do with yourself when you don’t have it.

How to fix it: Try to remember that technology is only a tool, not an extension of your life.

Texting

Consider how much your relationships could be strengthened if your conversations were in person or even over the phone, rather than through a text. If you like to text late at night, leave your phone in the other room when you go to bed. Give yourself a daily limit of texts sent and received, and when you reach it, stop.

E-mail

It’s an indispensable tool, it’s true, but limit yourself to checking it spontaneously every two hours during business, and only once after you get home. You’ll be more productive and free to enjoy your time.

Cell Phone

Keep your phone in your purse while you drive and resist the temptation to call others or answer a call until you get out of your car. That way you’ll be able to focus on driving, and give the person your full attention during the conversation."

by Ashley Evanson

The Quest for Excellence

Why I love this article - Because we are reminded that we can be Excellent! "This is the great day of decision for each of us. For many it is the time of beginning something that will go on for as long as you live. Rise to the high ground of spiritual, mental, and physical excellence. You can do it. You may not be a genius. You may be lacking in some skills. But so many of us can do better than we are now doing. ... We are people with a present and with a future. Don’t muff your opportunities. Be excellent. "

"I first read the following words 67 years ago in a college English class: “What a piece of work is man! how noble in reason! how infinite in faculty! in form and moving how express and admirable! in action how like an angel! in apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the world! the paragon of animals!” (Hamlet, act 2, scene 2, lines 303–7).
I recognize that these words of Hamlet were spoken in irony. And yet there is so much of truth in them. They describe the great potential excellence of men and women. If Shakespeare had written nothing else, I think he would have been remembered for these few words of soliloquy. They go hand in hand with these words of David:
“When I consider thy heavens, the work of thy fingers, the moon and the stars, which thou hast ordained;
“What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou visitest him?
“For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour” (Ps. 8:3–5).
They also go with the words of the Lord to Job when He spoke out of the whirlwind:
“Where wast thou when I laid the foundations of the earth? declare, if thou hast understanding. …
“When the morning stars sang together, and all the sons of God shouted for joy?” (Job 38:4, 7).
These magnificent words declare the wonder of man. And when I speak of man, I of course speak also of woman. We are all children of God, and there is something of His divinity within each of us. We are more than a son or daughter of Mr. and Mrs. So-and-So who reside in such-and-such a place. We are of the family of God, with such a tremendous potential for excellence. The distance between mediocrity and excellence can be ever so small. As we shall see again when the Winter Olympics come to Salt Lake City in 2002, that difference will be measured in tenths of seconds. The little extra effort we make becomes such a tremendous difference.
I heard one of my brethren tell of a recent visit he made to a prison. There he noticed a young man, handsome in appearance and intelligent in his ways.
My brother said to the prison official, “What is that young man doing in here?”
The reply was that one evening he had taken his mother’s car, had obtained some beer and drunk it, and then, out of control of himself, he drove the car down the sidewalk and killed two girls.
I do not know how long he will be in prison, but I do know that he will never entirely get over his feelings concerning the act that put him there. On such small hinges turn the gates of our lives. Little mistakes, which seem so unimportant in their beginnings, determine the eternal courses we follow.
I want to invite us all to walk a higher road of excellence. Recently I picked up an old book and read Lytton Strachey’s Life of Florence Nightingale. I think books of that kind are not read very much these days. I had read it once before, long ago. But my rereading brought a new sense of admiration and respect for this great young woman of England who made a tremendous difference in her time.
She was born to the upper class, to party and to dance, to go to the races and look pretty in society. But she would have none of it. Even her parents could not understand her. Her great overwhelming desire was to alleviate pain and suffering, to hasten healing, to make less dreadful the hospitals of the day. She never married. She devoted herself to nursing and became expert according to the training then available.
Britain became embroiled in the Crimean War. She had friends at the head of the government and relentlessly pursued and persuaded them until she was appointed head of the hospital in Scutari, where thousands of the victims of the war were brought.
The picture that greeted her here was one of absolute despair. An old warehouse served as a hospital. The sanitary conditions were terrible. The cooking facilities were terrible. Wounded men were crowded in great rooms that reeked of foul odors and were filled with the cries of the suffering.
This frail young woman, with those she had recruited to go with her, set to work. They beat down the walls of bureaucracy. They beat on the heads of the bureaucrats. I quote from Mr. Strachey: “For those who watched her at work among the sick, moving day and night from bed to bed, with that unflinching courage, with the indefatigable vigilance, it seems as if the concentrated force of an undivided and unparalleled devotion could hardly suffice for that first portion of her task alone. Wherever, in those vast wards suffering was at its worst and the need for help was greatest, there, as if by magic, was Miss Nightingale.”
The beds that held the suffering men stretched over four miles, with barely space between each bed to walk. But somehow, within a period of six months, “the confusion and the pressure in the wards had come to an end; order reigned in them, and cleanliness; the supplies were bountiful and prompt; important sanitary works had been carried out. One simple comparison of figures was enough to reveal the extraordinary change: the rate of mortality among the cases treated had fallen from 42 percent to 22 per thousand” (Life of Florence Nightingale [1934], 1186).
She had brought to pass an absolute miracle. Lives by the thousands were saved. Suffering was mitigated. Cheer and warmth and light came into the lives of men who otherwise would have died in that dark and dreadful place.
The war ended. She might have gone back to London a heroine. The public press had sung her praise. Her name was familiar to everyone. But she returned incognito to escape the adulation she might have received.
She continued her work for another 50 years, changing the hospitals both military and civilian. She died at an advanced age, bedridden for a good while, but still improving the circumstances of those who suffer.
Perhaps no other woman in the history of the world has done so much to reduce human misery as this lady with the lamp, who walked through the vast wards of Scutari in the middle of the 19th century, spreading cheer and comfort, faith and hope to those who writhed in pain. Her life was a life of excellence.
My wife likes to tell the story of a friend of hers who, when she was a little girl, was left an orphan. She scarcely knew her mother. As she grew, she wondered about her mother: what kind of a girl, what kind of a woman was she?
One day she came across her mother’s old report card. The teacher had noted on that card, “This student is excellent in every way.”
When she read that, her entire life changed. She recognized that her mother was a woman of excellence. Her whole attitude changed. She took on the aura of excellence herself and became a remarkable woman in her own right. She married a man who is recognized in many communities, and their children have distinguished themselves for their excellence.
I speak of the need for a little more effort, a little more self-discipline, a little more consecrated effort in the direction of excellence in our lives.
This is the great day of decision for each of us. For many it is the time of beginning something that will go on for as long as you live. I plead with you: don’t be a scrub! Rise to the high ground of spiritual, mental, and physical excellence. You can do it. You may not be a genius. You may be lacking in some skills. But so many of us can do better than we are now doing. We are members of this great Church whose influence is now felt over the world. We are people with a present and with a future. Don’t muff your opportunities. Be excellent.
Those of you who are not married are hoping to find a companion, among other things. I could wish for you nothing better than a good marriage, a happy marriage, a marriage fruitful in the sweet and satisfying things of life. Your marriage will not be excellent if it is marred with argument, if it is filled with disrespect one for another, if there is any lack of loyalty or devotion to one another. Cherish your spouse as the greatest possession of your life and treat him or her accordingly. Make it your constant goal to add to the happiness and comfort of your companion. Never permit yourself to let down in your affection, or your respect, or your faith in one another. Be excellent in every way.
You will find your greatest example in the Son of God. I hope that each of you will make Him your friend. I hope you will strive to walk in His paths, extending mercy, blessing those who struggle, living with less selfishness, reaching out to others.
He is the greatest example of excellence in all the world. He condescended to come to earth under the most humble of circumstances. He grew up as the son of Joseph the carpenter. He struggled with the adversary on the Mount of Temptation. He came forth resplendent and beautiful and magnificent to teach the world. During His brief ministry, He brought more of truth, more of hope, more of mercy, more of love than anyone else who has walked the earth. He died on Calvary’s cross for each of us. He arose the third day, “the firstfruits of them that slept” (1 Cor. 15:20), bringing the promise of resurrection to all mankind and the hope of exaltation to all who would walk in obedience to His teachings. He was the great paragon of righteousness, the only perfect man ever to walk the earth. His was the wondrous example toward whom each of us might point our lives in our eternal quest for excellence.
The prophet Moroni declared, “In the gift of his Son hath God prepared a more excellent way” (Ether 12:11). You have the witness of that faith. You have the testimony of that faith. You have the example of that faith. Let us all try to stand a little taller, rise a little higher, be a little better. Make the extra effort. You will be happier. You will know a new satisfaction, a new gladness in your heart.
Jesus said, “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect” (Matt. 5:48). That is the great crowning example of excellence. May each of us have a rich and wonderful life moving in that direction. We will not become perfect in a day or a month or a year. We will not accomplish it in a lifetime, but we can keep trying, starting with our more obvious weaknesses and gradually converting them to strengths as we go forward with our lives.
“Look to God, and live” (Alma 37:47). Kneel before Him in supplication. He will help you. He will bless you. He will comfort and sustain you. There will be progress. There will be growth. There will be improvement. And there will be much of added happiness.
If there has been failure in the past, if there has been sin, if there has been indolence, they may all be overcome.
Tremendous is your opportunity to reach beyond the hoped-for goal of wealth and worldly success, though that may have some modest importance, to build and strengthen others, to relieve suffering, to aid in making the world a better place, to pick up and carry the lantern of Florence Nightingale in walking through the pain-ridden wards of the world.
It was said of the Master that He “went about doing good” (Acts 10:38). In that process He became the epitome of perfection.
May the Lord bless each of us as we walk the path to perfection that the Lord has asked us to walk—with hope, with faith, and with that charity which “is the pure love of Christ” (Moro. 7:47)."

By: Gordon B. Hinckley

Great Advice...

Insights and counsel from President Gordon B. Hinckley

The Greatest Miracle of All
“I have seen miracles in my time, my brothers and sisters. The greatest miracle of all, I believe, is the transformation that comes into the life of a man or a woman who accepts the restored gospel of Jesus Christ and tries to live it in his or her life. How thankful I am for the wonders of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. It is indeed a marvelous work and a wonder, which has been brought to pass by the power of the Almighty in behalf of His sons and daughters.”

Becoming Acquainted With the Savior
“Bring into the lives of our young people something more of spirituality. … Cultivate in the heart of every [young person] a sense of his relationship to the Lord as he becomes acquainted with the Savior of the world by knowing some elements of the atonement of the Redeemer through which eternal life is made possible for each of us.”

Worthiness and Righteousness
“One of my concerns is that not enough of our people are making the efforts to get a temple recommend, which becomes a symbol of their worthiness and the righteousness of their desires. …
“The Sabbath is a great opportunity to teach your family to stay dressed up a little. It is also very important to read the scriptures. …
“Stay away from pornography! Avoid it as you would a terrible disease. It is a consuming disease. It is addictive. It gets hold of men and grasps them until they can scarcely let go. … These magazines, these videotapes, these late-night programs—you don’t need them. They will just hurt you; they won’t help you. They will destroy you if you persist in looking at them.”

Counsel to Youth
“You are great young people. I have said again and again, we have the finest generation of young people ever in the history of this church. I believe it. You know the gospel better. You come to seminary, and you learn about the things of the Lord here. You know more about the gospel than those of my generation at your age did without any question. I am satisfied of that. …
“You can determine the kind of life you will have in your thirties or forties by what you do in your teens.”

After Marriage
“When you are married, be fiercely loyal one to another. Selfishness is the great destroyer of happy family life. If you will make your first concern the comfort, the well-being, and the happiness of your companion, sublimating any personal concern to that loftier goal, you will be happy, and your marriage will go on throughout eternity.”

Motherhood
“In this age when more and more women are turning to daily work, how tremendous it is, once in a while, to stop and recognize that the greatest service that any woman will ever perform will be in nurturing, teaching, lifting, encouraging, and rearing her children in righteousness and truth. There is no other thing that will compare with that regardless of what she does.
“I hope that the women of the Church will not slight their greatest responsibility in favor of a lesser responsibility. To the mothers of this church, every mother who is here this day, I want to say that, as the years pass, you will become increasingly grateful for that which you did in molding the lives of your children in the direction of righteousness and goodness and integrity and faith. …
“I think I can share this with you. As I sat in the Tabernacle at the last conference and was sustained by the people of this church, there came before me in my mind’s eye, the picture of my mother when I was a little boy. And I’m sure she must have thought then that I wouldn’t amount to much because I was not an easy little boy to deal with. I am grateful that I have the opportunity in my old age to bring honor to her name. …
“It’s been the mothers who have been the great carriers and purveyors of faith throughout the history of this church. I believe that with all my heart.”
by: Gordon B. Hinkley

Hallmarks of a Happy Home

Where is happiness? Happiness is right where you are. Happiness is found in our hearts and in our homes. How do we bring happiness to our homes? "We are responsible for the home we build. We must build wisely, for eternity is not a short voyage. There will be calm and wind, sunlight and shadows, joy and sorrow. But if we really try, our home can be a bit of heaven here on earth." President Monson's article gives us insights and instruction for how we can make our home a bit of heaven and a happy place. Hallmarks of a Happy Home ”consist of: 1. A pattern of prayer, 2. A library of learning, 3. A legacy of love, and 4. A treasury of testimony. It is truly a beautiful and inspiring article.

“Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God.” (Joseph Smith, Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, sel. by Joseph Fielding Smith, Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1938, pp. 255–56.)
This description of such a universal goal was provided by the Prophet Joseph Smith. It was relevant then. It is relevant now. With such a clear road map to follow, why then are there so many unhappy people? Frequently, frowns outnumber smiles and despair dampens joy. We live so far below the level of our divine possibilities. Some become confused by materialism, entangled by sin, and lost among the passing parade of humanity. Others cry out in the words of the convert of Philip of old: “How can I [find my way], except some man should guide me?” (Acts 8:31.)
Happiness does not consist of a glut of luxury, the world’s idea of a “good time.” Nor must we search for it in faraway places with strange-sounding names. Happiness is found at home.
All of us remember the home of our childhood. Interestingly, our thoughts do not dwell on whether the house was large or small, the neighborhood fashionable or downtrodden. Rather, we delight in the experiences we shared as a family. The home is the laboratory of our lives, and what we learn there largely determines what we do when we leave there.
Mrs. Margaret Thatcher, prime minister of Great Britain, expressed the profound philosophy: “The family is the building block of society. It is a nursery, a school, a hospital, a leisure centre, a place of refuge and a place of rest. It encompasses the whole of the society. It fashions our beliefs; it is the preparation for the rest of our life.” (London Times, 26 May 1988.)
“Home is where the heart is.” It does take “a heap o’ livin’ ” to make a house a home (Edgar A. Guest, “Home,” in The Family Book of Best-Loved Poems, ed. David L. George, Garden City, N.Y.: Doubleday, 1952, p. 151–52.) “Home, home, sweet, sweet home, Be it ever so humble, there’s no place like home.” (Hymns, 1948, no. 185.) We turn from the reverie of such pleasant recollections. We contemplate parents gone, family grown, childhood vanished. Slowly but surely we face the truth: We are responsible for the home we build. We must build wisely, for eternity is not a short voyage. There will be calm and wind, sunlight and shadows, joy and sorrow. But if we really try, our home can be a bit of heaven here on earth. The thoughts we think, the deeds we do, the lives we live influence not only the success of our earthly journey; they mark the way to our eternal goals.
Happy homes come in a variety of appearances. Some feature large families with father, mother, brothers, and sisters living together in a spirit of love. Others consist of a single parent with one or two children, while other homes have but one occupant. There are, however, identifying features which are to be found in a happy home, whatever the number or description of its family members. I refer to these as “Hallmarks of a Happy Home.” They consist of:
1. A pattern of prayer.
2. A library of learning.
3. A legacy of love.
4. A treasury of testimony.
“Prayer is the soul’s sincere desire, Uttered or unexpressed.” (Hymns, 1985, no. 145.) So universal is its application, so beneficial its result, that prayer qualifies as the number-one hallmark of a happy home. As parents listen to the prayer of a child, they too draw close to God. These little ones, who so recently have been with their Heavenly Father, have no inhibitions in expressing to Him their feelings, their wishes, their thanks.
Family prayer is the greatest deterrent to sin, and hence the most beneficent provider of joy and happiness. The old saying is yet true: “The family that prays together stays together.”
“It is not possible for a married couple to reach happiness with eyes fixed on different stars; … they must set up a single ideal and work toward [it]. … Cease cherishing impossible fancies of impossible futures. Take the best of [your] dreams and fit them to life as it comes every day.” (Temple Bailey, “The Bride Who Makes Her Dreams Come True,” in Ladies’ Home Journal, 1912.)
On October 7, my wife, Frances, and I will have been married forty years. Our marriage took place just to the east of us in the holy temple. He who performed the ceremony, Benjamin Bowring, counseled us: “May I offer you newlyweds a formula which will ensure that any disagreement you may have will last no longer than one day? Every night kneel by the side of your bed. One night, Brother Monson, you offer the prayer, aloud, on bended knee. The next night you, Sister Monson, offer the prayer, aloud, on bended knee. I can then assure you that any misunderstanding that develops during the day will vanish as you pray. You simply can’t pray together and retain any but the best of feelings toward one another.”
When I was called to the Council of the Twelve just twenty-five years ago this weekend, President McKay asked me concerning my family. I related to him this guiding formula of prayer and bore witness to its validity. He sat back in his large leather chair and, with a smile, responded, “The same formula that has worked for you has blessed the lives of my family during all the years of our marriage.”
Prayer is the passport to spiritual power.
A second hallmark of a happy home is discovered when home is a library of learning. An essential part of our learning library will be good books.
Books are keys to wisdom’s treasure; Books are gates to lands of pleasure; Books are paths that upward lead; Books are friends. Come, let us read. (Emilie Poulsson.)
Reading is one of the true pleasures of life. In our age of mass culture, when so much that we encounter is abridged, adapted, adulterated, shredded, and boiled down, it is mind-easing and mind-inspiring to sit down privately with a congenial book.
James A. Michener, prominent author, suggests, “A nation becomes what its young people read in their youth. Its ideals are fashioned then, its goals strongly determined.”
The Lord counseled, “Seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom; seek learning, even by study and also by faith.” (D&C 88:118.)
The standard works offer the library of learning of which I speak. We must be careful not to underestimate the capacity of children to read and to understand the word of God.
A few months ago we took our grandchildren on an escorted tour of the Church printing facilities. There, all of us saw the missionary edition of the Book of Mormon coming off the delivery line—printed, bound, and trimmed, ready for reading. I said to a young grandson, “The operator says that you can remove one copy of the Book of Mormon to be your very own. You select the copy, and it will then be yours.”
Removing one finished copy of the book, he clutched it to his breast and said with sincerity, “I love the Book of Mormon. This is my book.”
I really don’t remember other events of that day, but none of us who was there will ever forget the honest expression from the heart of a child.
As parents, we should remember that our lives may be the book from the family library which the children most treasure. Are our examples worthy of emulation? Do we live in such a way that a son or a daughter may say, “I want to follow my dad,” or “I want to be like my mother”? Unlike the book on the library shelf, the covers of which shield the contents, our lives cannot be closed. Parents, we truly are an open book.
A third hallmark of a happy home is a legacy of love.
As a small boy, I enjoyed visiting the home of my grandmother on Bueno Avenue here in Salt Lake City. Grandmother was always so happy to see us and to draw us close to her. Seated on her lap, we listened as she read to us.
Her youngest son and his wife now occupy that same home. I visited there recently. The fireplug on the curb seemed so small compared to its size when I climbed its lofty heights those long years ago. The friendly porch was the same, the quiet, peaceful atmosphere not altered. Hanging on the kitchen wall was a framed expression which my aunt had embroidered. It carried a world of practical application: “Choose your love; love your choice.” She who prepared that message is now in frail health. Her husband, Ray, cares for her constantly and is the epitome of faithful and enduring love. She reciprocates in her own way. They live the lesson they framed.
Seemingly little lessons of love are observed by children as they silently absorb the examples of their parents. My own father, a printer, worked long and hard practically every day of his life. I’m certain that on the Sabbath he would have enjoyed just being at home. Rather, he visited elderly family members and brought cheer into their lives.
One was his uncle, who was crippled by arthritis so severe that he could not walk or care for himself. On a Sunday afternoon Dad would say to me, “Come along, Tommy; let’s take Uncle Elias for a short drive.” Boarding the old 1928 Oldsmobile, we would proceed to Eighth West, where, at the home of Uncle Elias, I would wait in the car while Dad went inside. Soon he would emerge from the house, carrying in his arms like a china doll his crippled uncle. I then would open the door and watch how tenderly and with such affection my father would place Uncle Elias in the front seat so he would have a fine view while I occupied the rear seat.
The drive was brief and the conversation limited, but oh, what a legacy of love! Father never read to me from the Bible about the good Samaritan. Rather, he took me with him and Uncle Elias in that old 1928 Oldsmobile along the road to Jericho.
When our homes carry the legacy of love, we will not receive Jacob’s chastisement as recorded in the Book of Mormon: “Ye have broken the hearts of your tender wives, and lost the confidence of your children, because of your bad examples before them; and the sobbings of their hearts ascend up to God against you.” (Jacob 2:35.)
Let us not be discouraged by the many newspaper and television accounts of discord—and sometimes cruelty—between companions and assume that virtue has vanished and love’s lamp no longer glows. Two of my dearest friends now lie in poor health and helpless. They are not alone. Their faithful companions minister to them in tender love. My friend Pres, who rarely leaves the side of his wife, said of her, “Christine is weaker but still beautiful. I love her so.” What a noble tribute to fidelity, to love, to marriage!
Another, a wife named Gertrude, makes comfortable her husband, Mark, in his room. Everything is just as he would want the room to be. She reads to him. She chats with him about the family. She once said to me during this long vigil, “I love him more than ever.”
For a beautiful example of “love at home,” we need not look beyond the family of President and Sister Benson. My wife and I were privileged to attend the Bensons’ sixty-second wedding anniversary party just three weeks ago. Children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren rejoiced as the President and his companion held hands and led the group in singing “Keep the Home Fires Burning,” “Love’s Old Sweet Song,” and “I Love You Truly.” The entire Church can well emulate the Bensons’ example of studying the scriptures, attending the temple, and enjoying life together.
These are pictures which portray a legacy of love as a hallmark of a happy home.
A fourth hallmark of a happy home is a treasury of testimony. “The first and foremost opportunity for teaching in the Church lies in the home,” observed President David O. McKay. “A true Mormon home is one in which if Christ should chance to enter, he would be pleased to linger and to rest.” (Gospel Ideals, Salt Lake City: Improvement Era, 1953, p. 169.)
What are we doing to ensure that our homes meet this description? It isn’t enough for parents alone to have strong testimonies. Children can ride only so long on the coattails of a parent’s conviction.
President Heber J. Grant declared: “It is our duty to teach our children in their youth. I may know that the gospel is true, and so may my wife; but I want to tell you that our children will not know that the gospel is true unless they study it and gain a testimony for themselves.”
A love for the Savior, a reverence for His name, and genuine respect one for another will provide a fertile seedbed for a testimony to grow.
Learning the gospel, bearing a testimony, leading a family are rarely if ever simple processes. Life’s journey is characterized by bumps in the road, swells in the sea—even the turbulence of our times.
Some years ago, while visiting the members and missionaries in Australia, I witnessed a sublime example depicting how a treasury of testimony can bless and sanctify a home. The mission president, Horace D. Ensign, and I were traveling the long distance from Sydney to Darwin, where I was to break ground for our first chapel in that city. En route we had a scheduled stop at a mining community named Mt. Isa. As we entered the small airport at Mt. Isa, a woman and her two children approached. She said, “I am Judith Louden, a member of the Church, and these are my two children. We thought you might be on this flight, so we have come to visit with you during your brief stopover.” She explained that her husband was not a member of the Church and that she and the children were indeed the only members in the entire area. We shared lessons and bore testimony.
Time passed. As we prepared to reboard, Sister Louden looked so forlorn, so alone. She pleaded, “You can’t go yet; I have so missed the Church.” Suddenly the loudspeaker announced a thirty-minute mechanical delay of our flight. Sister Louden whispered, “My prayer has just been answered.” She then asked how she might influence her husband to show an interest in the gospel. We counseled her to include him in their home Primary lesson each week and be to him a living testimony of the gospel. I mentioned we would send to her a subscription to The Children’s Friend and additional helps for her family teaching. We urged that she never give up on her husband.
We departed Mt. Isa, a city to which I have never returned. I shall, however, always hold dear in memory that sweet mother and those precious children extending a tear-filled expression and a fond wave of gratitude and good-bye.
Several years later, while speaking at a priesthood leadership meeting in Brisbane, Australia, I emphasized the significance of gospel scholarship in the home and the importance of living the gospel and being examples of the truth. I shared with the men assembled the account of Sister Louden and the impact her faith and determination had made on me. As I concluded, I said, “I suppose I’ll never know if Sister Louden’s husband ever joined the Church, but he couldn’t have found a better model to follow.”
One of the leaders raised his hand, then stood and declared, “Brother Monson, I am Richard Louden. The woman of whom you speak is my wife. The children [his voice quavered] are our children. We are a forever family now, thanks in part to the persistence and the patience of my dear wife. She did it all.” Not a word was spoken. The silence was broken only by sniffles and muffled sobs and marked by the sight of tears streaming from every eye.
My brothers and sisters, let us determine, whatever our circumstance, to make of our houses happy homes. Let us open wide the windows of our hearts, that each family member may feel welcome and “at home.” Let us open also the doors of our very souls, that the dear Christ may enter. Remember His promise: “Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him.” (Rev. 3:20.)
How welcome He will feel, how joyful will be our lives, when the “Hallmarks of a Happy Home” greet Him, even:

A pattern of prayer;

A library of learning;

A legacy of love;

A treasury of testimony.
That our loving Heavenly Father may bless all of us in our quest for such happy homes is my prayer, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen."
by: Thomas S. Monson

Laugh!!

Come What May and Love It

"I remember when one of our daughters went on a blind date. She was all dressed up and waiting for her date to arrive when the doorbell rang. In walked a man who seemed a little old, but she tried to be polite. She introduced him to me and my wife and the other children; then she put on her coat and went out the door. We watched as she got into the car, but the car didn't move. Eventually our daughter got out of the car and, red faced, ran back into the house. The man that she thought was her blind date had actually come to pick up another of our daughters who had agreed to be a babysitter for him and his wife.
We all had a good laugh over that. In fact, we couldn't stop laughing. Later, when our daughter's real blind date showed up, I couldn't come out to meet him because I was still in the kitchen laughing. Now I realize that our daughter could have felt humiliated and embarrassed. But she laughed with us, and as a result, we still laugh about it today.
The next time you're tempted to groan, you might try to laugh instead. It will extend your life and make the lives of all those around you more enjoyable." --by Jospeh B. Wirthlin

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Laugh at yourself first, before anyone else can. ~ Elsa Maxwell

Laughter is the brush that sweeps away the cobwebs of the heart. ~ Mort Walker

Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face. ~ Victor Hugo

Laughter is the jam on the toast of life. It adds flavor, keeps it from being too dry, and makes it easier to swallow. ~ Diane Johnson

Trouble knocked on the door, but, hearing laughter, hurried away. ~Benjamin Franklin

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful. ~ Bob Hope

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"For many, laughter is a powerful healing elixir, or better yet ... natural Prozac. It enables us to reframe our worries and it has extraordinary capacity to help us reestablish a positive and healthy perspective when we're down. Yet even more amazing is the fact that some of the best jokes are based on true-to-life stories about things that actually happen to ordinary people.
Some of the most famous comedians who ever lived developed their materials through one phenomenal talent. They progressively honed their awareness of what was really happening around them. Through such observations, they were able to surgically extract a light-hearted perspective even in the darkest of times. ...

The most important question we face is "how to turn that frown upside down?"
The process requires 7 simple steps.

1. Give yourself permission to laugh at yourself.
2. Rediscover your sense of humor by easing off your drive for perfection and seriousness while encouraging a light-hearted approach whenever possible.
3. Stimulate your mind to uncover the humor in every situation and give your laughter muscles a daily workout.
4. Allow laughter to replace alcohol, tobacco, drugs and medications when you're stressed and need to cope.
5. Encourage your playful side to emerge even during those challenging times.
6. Accept every funny happenstance as a gift to be shared. When you laugh, especially at yourself, everyone else will join in. Laughter is nothing less than contagious - and healing.
7. Don't take yourself or anyone else too seriously.

There is a fundamental body of medical evidence that shows laughter's positive effects on the immune system. It has also been recently established that future health outcomes are enhanced by "the glass thatÕs half full" as opposed to "the glass that's half empty." The same rationale likely holds true for those who laugh. Someday, I'm sure we'll find what a great philosopher once said, "he who laughs ... lasts"" - Mind Over Matter! " --from: Barry Bittman, MD

Hush...

One of my goals is to be less critical of others - hush thoughts and words that are not necessary! This is a great article from Sri Chinmoy Inspiration about criticism.

"Criticizing others is a tricky business because people are rarely receptive to criticism. However, there are ways to point out mistakes to others which will make them more amenable to taking on board our suggestions. But, whilst it can be important to point out the mistakes of others, it is equally important that we avoid becoming a full time critic. If we spend all our energy on judging and criticizing others we will just become a negative person and do nothing to effect real change.

Tips on Effective Criticism

1. Avoiding Unnecessary Criticism

We are apt to criticise unnecessarily. It is as if we are drawn to the faults of others and forget the good things they do. Criticism rarely helps a situation; when we criticise people they invariably feel miserable and when they are unhappy they are unlikely to lead better lives. If we can avoid criticising others we should. It is also important to avoid feeling responsible for the way others lead their lives; if you think a friend is too carefree with spending money, it is not necessary to keep criticising them for it. To a large extent, we have to give people the freedom to make their own choices in life. If we constantly criticise others it suggests that we want to direct their lives for them, something we should avoid doing.

Those who serve the world constantly
Do not have time
To criticise others,

While those who do not serve
Others selflessly
Have endless time
To criticise the whole world.

- Sri Chinmoy

2. Avoid Criticising inwardly

Quite often we spend a lot of time criticising others inwardly. We may not say it in words; but our thoughts are filled with criticisms of other people. When we think negatively about other people we do nothing to change that person; the only thing we achieve is to become negative ourselves. If we spend our mental energy in criticising other people we will not get any abiding feeling of satisfaction; we will certainly not become a better person ourselves. What happens when we criticise others is that the ego feels a sense of superiority. We criticise others to make ourselves feel better; but, this feeling of superiority only gives a pseudo happiness based on a sense of ‘being a better person’. True abiding happiness will come when we can feel a sense of oneness with others. When we identify with others we seek to focus on their good qualities and forget their mistakes.

• Be careful about criticising inwardly - would you be happy for your thoughts to be made public? Try concentrating on holding thoughts you would not be embarrassed to share outwardly.

3. Offer Encouragement

A clever way to criticise is to offer encouragement for good things that people have done. If you offer sincere encouragement and praise then people will be much more receptive to hearing criticisms and suggestions for improvements. This is not about offering false flattery; it is about having a balance between praise and criticism. If you only criticise and point out people’s faults, this is unbalanced and people will lose their self confidence. Everyone is a mixture of good qualities and bad qualities; encouraging their good qualities is the best way to diminish their mistakes and bad qualities.

4. Avoid Moralising

When people make a mistake and need correcting, we should not shy away from doing it. If people continue to make a mistake, it will cause endless problems. To make the criticism effective we need to make it in a detached and professional way - It is important to avoid a sense of moralising. For example, point out the mistake but don’t add unnecessary judgements about how bad they are to do it. The moralising will only make people defensive and less willing to act on your suggestions.

5. Make Criticism non personal.

When we criticise others, the biggest problem is that people tend to take it personally. If we tell someone they have missed a few commas out of their writing, unfortunately some people take this as personal criticism of their self. There are a few ways to avoid this. Firstly, we can try and make the criticism general and avoid focusing on one person. Another useful strategy is to make it clear this is the kind of mistake that we may have made. If we point out a mistake and say that I have often done that myself (even if we haven’t), it becomes much less problematic. We do not make the person feel bad because we show that we have also made that mistake."

Just Do It!!

There's so much to read about self-improvement and setting and achieving goals. We can read about, talk about, learn about it, but the most important thing we can do is summed up from a favorite quote from President Spencer W. Kimball. He sums up how we can achieve our goals in two short words "Do It!"

However, here is some more information on the subject, 7 Secrets of Self Improvement

"Self improvement is a continuous struggle to better ourselves; it the aspiration to transcend our weaknesses and limitations. There is no quick fix for our self development; it requires perseverance, patience and a constant aspiration to lead a better life. These are some of the factors that will expedite our progress.

1. Don’t Just Talk

It is easy to spend several hours reading and talking about making changes to our life. But, all the books in the world won’t help unless we can make real changes to our life. Books can give us inspiration, but, for every book we read it can take many years to actually understand and implement the changes in our lives. Similarly it is good to talk and articulate what we should do, but the real test is whether we can practise what we preach.

2. Discipline / regularity

Self improvement is not something that can do once a week when we feel like it. Self improvement requires a certain discipline and regularity. For many discipline brings to mind negative connotations of doing something we don’t really want to. However, the discipline here is really the motivation to continue doing the right thing. If something is good to do, there is no need to just do it occasionally. After a while our discipline to create good habits, no longer feels like discipline; we want to do it simply because this is what we enjoy doing. Our bad habits no longer seem attractive.

3. Think of others

Self improvement doesn’t mean we focus excessively on ourselves. It is a paradox of self improvement that real progress comes when we give less importance to our ego and give more consideration to others. When we think of others a little more and ourselves a little less, we will definitely make progress in becoming a better person.

4. Vision / Goals / Progress

The first requirement of self development is that we must have an aim for something better. Even if our goals and dreams are very modest, it is vital to have something to aim for. How can we make any self improvement if we are content to remain as we are? Try writing down a very simple list of 5-7 items in which you would like to improve and give them a priority in your life.

5. Gain Inspiration from Others

Self improvement is not a lonely furrow. Seek the company of like minded people. There is great power in association, when we associate with people who have a little inner peace in their own lives it is easier to bring it to the fore in ours. What is important is the inspiration and encouragement we receive by associating with others.

6. Mind / Body / Spirit

There are many different aspects of our being which are intertwined together. We should pay attention to all these different aspects. If we want to improve our thoughts and avoid negative moods, we should try to keep the body healthy as well. Regular exercise can help improve our mood, often more effectively than much pondering over different belief systems. A clear mind will definitely be easier with a fit body.

7. The Power of Happiness.

In talking about self improvement it is important to avoid making it sound like an intellectual exercise. Real self development requires a more holistic approach than merely understanding and reading. We should try to bring to the fore the capacity of the heart which embodies simplicity and joy. When we are sincerely happy, we can easily make progress. If we are miserable and frustrated everything becomes difficult. We don’t make progress through being miserable; we need to overcome any negative mindset."

Achieving Your Childhood Dreams

Randy Pausch was a professor at Carnegie Mellon who was dying of pancreatic cancer. He was only given months to live, and gave a last lecture before leaving the University last September. His lecture was entitled, "Achieving Your Childhood Dreams." It had a profound impact on me and how I want to live my life. If you have a chance, listen to the lecture or read the book and you will find that you walk away with a resolve to become a better person, by not only achieving your dreams but helping others to do the same.

During the lecture he talks about specific dreams he had as a child. Think about... "What were your dreams as a child?" and "What are your dreams as an adult?" I think having dreams or passions are what keeps us human; it's what keeps us excited about life. In his speech Randy says, "It's not that we actually achieve our dreams, it is what we learn along the journey."

Happiness! -(great quotes)

"Some of the happiest people I know have none of the things the world insists are necessary for satisfaction and joy..."

-Joseph B. Wirthlin
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"The way we react to adversity can be a major factor in how happy and successful we can be in life." -Joseph B. Wirthlin
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"Tomorrow's joy or tomorrow's despair...
Has it roots in decisions we make today.
Perhaps some people think to themselves:
'I know I need to change some things in my life.
Maybe later,
But not now.'
Those who stand at the threshold of life
Always waiting for the right time to change
Are like the man who stands at the bank of a river
Waiting for the water to pass
So he can cross on dry land.
Today is the day of decision."
-Joseph B. Wirthlin
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'It is wonderful to know that our Heavenly Father loves us–even with all our flaws!
His love is such that even should we give up on ourselves, He never will."
We see ourselves in terms of yesterday and today.
Our Heavenly Father sees us in terms of forever.
Although we might settle for less,
Heavenly Father won't
For He sees us
As the glorious beings we are capable of becoming."
-Joseph B Wirthlin

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"If we only look around us,
There are a thousand reasons for us not to be happy,
And it is simplicity itself
To blame our unhappiness
On the things we lack in life.
It doesn't take any talent at all to find them.
The problem is,
The more we focus on the things we don't have,
The more unhappy and more resentful we become"
-Joseph B.Wirthlin

Seven Habits of Highly Effective People - (a summary)

The 'Seven Habits' are a remarkable set of inspirational and aspirational standards for anyone who seeks to live a full, purposeful and good life, and are applicable today more than ever.

habit 1 - be proactive®

This is the ability to control one's environment, rather than have it control you, as is so often the case. Self determination, choice, and the power to decide response to stimulus, conditions and circumstances

habit 2 - begin with the end in mind®

Covey calls this the habit of personal leadership - leading oneself that is, towards what you consider your aims. By developing the habit of concentrating on relevant activities you will build a platform to avoid distractions and become more productive and successful.

habit 3 - put first things first®

Covey calls this the habit of personal management. This is about organising and implementing activities in line with the aims established in habit 2. Covey says that habit 2 is the first, or mental creation; habit 3 is the second, or physical creation. (See the section on time management.)

habit 4 - think win-win®

Covey calls this the habit of interpersonal leadership, necessary because achievements are largely dependent on co-operative efforts with others. He says that win-win is based on the assumption that there is plenty for everyone, and that success follows a co-operative approach more naturally than the confrontation of win-or-lose.

habit 5 - seek first to understand and then to be understood®

One of the great maxims of the modern age. This is Covey's habit of communication, and it's extremely powerful. Covey helps to explain this in his simple analogy 'diagnose before you prescribe'. Simple and effective, and essential for developing and maintaining positive relationships in all aspects of life. (See the associated sections on Empathy, Transactional Analysis, and the Johari Window.)

habit 6 - synergize®

Covey says this is the habit of creative co-operation - the principle that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, which implicitly lays down the challenge to see the good and potential in the other person's contribution.

habit 7 - sharpen the saw®

This is the habit of self renewal, says Covey, and it necessarily surrounds all the other habits, enabling and encouraging them to happen and grow. Covey interprets the self into four parts: the spiritual, mental, physical and the social/emotional, which all need feeding and developing.

A 30 day self improvement idea

This is a great idea of how to improve and change ourselves. Instead of trying to change something permanently and getting overwhelmed and doing nothing. Decide to change it for 30 days (idea below from Sri Chinmoy Inspirtation)

"We often look at aspects of our lifestyle and say to ourselves “oh, I wish I could change that”, but the prospect of committing to change for an indefinite period of time is something we often find quite intimidating! Instead, why not try and embark on a new course of action for a finite period of, say, a month? There is some scientific evidence to support the notion that after about three weeks of doing something, a habit begins to form and you find it much easier to do that thing. 30 days is also a long enough time for you to see the benefits of what you are doing, so that you will be encouraged to pursue it further.

A little writing project with a big difference

No, we’re not talking about an essay or a creative composition - we’re only talking about a couple of minutes in the morning where you write down three dreams you hope to fulfill. You might start with writing down some things you hope to get done within the day, but often a spontaneous idea will often come along, or a thing you’ve never done but always wanted to try - write them all down, even if they are impractical at the moment or cannot be fulfilled immediately. The very act of writing generates a spontaneous energy to go out and fulfill the dream; it might not be realised overnight, but at least on that day you have begun to take the first step.

For a month you can keep by your bedside a book with at least 30 pages, one for each day, and write as soon as you get up. Better still, you could get a big calendar with large boxes for each day, so you can see today’s intentions against the light of your previous intentions.

In addition, every day for a month you can write down seven things you currently have in your life that you are grateful for. We spend so much of our lives focusing on what is wrong with ourselves and the world; this exercise will help balance the scales by bringing your awareness to the good things in life that often go unnoticed. A friend of mine recently told me of an inspiring article she read in a magazine about a woman who had recently overcome a severe bout of clinical depression. Now having emerged the other side of that experience, she relates how one thing that really helped her was being grateful for absolutely everything, even the tiniest little things, like the wind brushing through her hair, or a beautiful flower that caught the corner of her eye. For me, this definitely changed my focus whilst doing this exercise - in addition to being grateful for the ‘big’ reasons like having a content life and an opportunity to discover myself, I could also find millions of small reasons to be grateful right around me."